My Dog is a Cliche – Postman Wars

dog with letter

Holly has a nemesis. I know she’s a walking, drooling cliche but it’s the postman.He keeps posting letters through the door and leaving everytime Holly barks. So the coward doesn’t even stay to face the music…

She’s not keen on visitors at the best of times but this time she’s bearing a grudge. She only needs to see him getting out of his van or crossing the street on a walk and she starts eyeballing him. It’s like she’s thinking “What self respecting visitor would be wearing shorts in this cold weather? That is definitely a postman.”

She’s on red alert when she hears the van pull up our drive. She restricts herself to barking at him when we aren’t in the house. Apart from the shameful time we were in the garden and the gates were open and she chased his van down the drive but we don’t talk about that…

When we are home she adds an extra level of excitement as we rush to see whether we can pick up the mail before Holly shreds it.

Half our Christmas cards will have a little doggie chew mark on the corner where we didn’t quite make it. This is not quite as bad as when Simon ordered a new part for his computer from a well known internet auction site and Holly ripped open the attractive jiffy bag and ate the contents. After being really pleased to outbid his rivals and win the item Simon was slightly less pleased when he was asked to write a review and had to put “Arrived quickly and well packaged before being eaten by my dog.”

So if you plan to send us a Christmas card this year please put it in a thick envelope as I don’t think that Holly will be extending the season of goodwill to include postmen…

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World’s Worst Jokes About Dogs

Dog jokes

It’s confession time…I secretly love bad jokes about dogs. Some of these would be too bad even for a Christmas cracker… Enjoy

My dog’s got no nose.
How does he smell?

Why should you walk carefully when it’s raining cats and dogs?
You might step in a poodle.

Click here to see more extremely woof jokes. You have been warned…

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Why Dogs Rule and Cats Drool

Here are 10 reasons why dogs are better than cats in case you needed some persuasion…(and a bit of a laugh).

Snooty catCats have never completely got over the snootiness caused by the fact that in Ancient Egypt they were worshipped as gods.

Read the other 9 reasons here. Go on you know that you want to…

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My Favourite Quotes About Dogs

Peke dog

Here is a round up of my favourite quotes about our four-legged friends. I hope that you love them as much as I do!

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What Does Your Favourite Dog Reveal About You?

Dog owners are supposed to end up looking like their pets. But what does your favourite dog reveal about your personality?

Here are some of the most famous of our four-legged friends and what liking them really says about you.

If Lassie has a special place in your heart you remember the past with wistful nostalgia and value persistent loyal companionship above all else. Perhaps you also spend rather a long time on personal grooming…

Fans of Gromit have a very British sense of humour and prize intelligence and ingenuity. You also keep your head in a crisis.

If Shep the collie from “Blue Peter” and “Go with Noakes” is your top dog then you treasure the close relationship between a man and his dog, enjoy walking in the countryside and feel that there is a new adventure waiting for you around every corner.

If Scooby Doo is your favourite dog you can forgive flaws in your friends as long as they are loyal and make you laugh. Maybe you also enjoy a Scooby snack? If Scrappy Doo is your favourite then I’m sorry but you are just plain annoying.

If Snoopy is your perfect pooch then you have a wry sense of humour and cherish your childhood friendships. Perhaps you also enjoy a snooze in the afternoon although not necessarily on the roof of your kennel!

Forget the famous dogs though. Any dog owner will tell you that their own dog is their favourite. So whether it’s a moody Terrier, a boisterous Dalmatian, a Labrador with middle age spread, a rescue dog with a hard luck story or a Collie that’s top of its class you need to realise that what’s on the end of your lead says a lot more about you than you think.

So when you pass a butch skinhead with a neck as wide as his face walking a Toy Poodle in the park you can surmise that he’s a big misunderstood softie who wants to get in touch with his feminine side. That or he’s walking his wife’s dog…

Louise Dolan

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Rover Reporter rounds up Top Dog News of 2011

Rover our news hound loves a heart warming and funny doggy story. Here are five of his favourite news reports from 2011.

Pipper the Pooch Peppers Hunter’s Posterior

It’s nice to see animals working together to give a hunter a taste of his own medicine.

A 46 year old Utah man was out duck hunting with a friend and his friend’s dog, a yellow Labrador retriever named Pipper.

The two hunting partners had stopped their boat in a marsh area where their duck decoys were placed to retrieve a duck they had shot, and the man laid his 12-gauge shotgun across the bow of the vessel and stepped into the shallow water.

“The dog jumped into the boat and was stepping over the shotgun and made it discharge somehow. The guy was still walking away from the boat and he took it in the buttocks,” said Box Elder County Sheriff Chief Deputy Kevin Potter.

Medical personnel removed 27 shotgun pellets from the hunter’s backside and he has now fully recovered. Better luck next time Pipper!

World’s Oldest Dog still Learns New Tricks

Pip the terrier cross is believed to be the world’s oldest dog at 24 and she still loves learning new tricks. The amazing dog still regularly performs in a dog display team. She only has minor problems with her hearing and eyesight so owner Tiffany Dyer has changed her commands to use more signals and clicks.

Tiffany of Brentwood, Essex, said: “She’s a little old lady but still gives the younger ones a run for their money.”

It just goes to show how important exercise and mental stimulation is for dogs. Rover wishes Pip and her owner a very Happy New Year.

See photos of veteran dog Pip:

Surfer Dude Dogs Catch Waves

The first dog surfing contest on Lahinch beach was held in County Clare this year and the BBC were there to take photos of the dishevelled dogs riding the crest of the waves. I like the photo of the cool canine wearing shades standing near the cliffs best. Maybe he’ll have a go next year…

Dog-in-Boots because he’s Allergic to Grass

Cute 8 year old Jack Russell Jaxs wears specially made boots for walkies and it’s not a fashion statement. The poor dog suffers a painful allergic reaction causing clumps of his fur to fall out and sores on his feet if he comes into contact with grass.

But Jax’s life was transformed after a vet had him tested and showed that he was allergic to grass and suggested that his owner Maria Domanic fit him with doggy boots. The boots are made of canvas and are attached using Velcro.

Jaxs was a little apprehensive of the boots at first but now enjoys running around the fields like any other dog. He is so attached to his boots that he picks them up in his mouth before walkies and even sleeps with them in his basket.

To see a photo of gorgeous Jaxs running in his boots click here

Greyfriars Bobby was a Scam to Lure Tourists

Historian Jan Bondeson hit the headlines when he claimed that the most faithful dog in the world, which kept a 14 year vigil at his master’s grave in Edinburgh, was nothing more than a Victorian business stunt.

The 140 year old story of Greyfriars Bobby continues to draw tourists to the graveyard that was once inhabited by the Skye Terrier. A bronze fountain was erected in his memory in the cemetery and the dog was immortalised on the silver screen by Walt Disney in a 1961 film.

Bondeson, a senior lecturer at Cardiff University claims that Bobby was a happy little stray dog who would hunt rats in the church and was well fed by the locals. According to Bondeson, the story of Bobby’s undying devotion was dreamt up by cemetery curator, James Brown and restaurant owner, John Traill, to drum up trade for local businesses.

The first Bobby, an old mongrel, died in 1867, leaving Brown and Traill with a problem on their hands, Bondeson said.

“A dead Bobby was no good for business, so they replaced him with a pedigree Skye terrier who lived for a further five years until 1872, after which time it did not take long for the fountain to be erected,” said Bondeson.

What a famous pup-licity stunt!

Louise Dolan

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Fun Dog Breed Quiz

How many dog breeds can you name from the following picture clues? Some of them are doggoned tricky…

Louise Dolan

Copyright 2011

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